They say the worst kind of pain isn’t physical, but emotional. Lately I’ve learned that it’s true. These have been tough times for me. Today I attended the funeral of a schoolmate, seventeen year old Dylan* who died of cancer a few days ago. It’s not fair, he shouldn’t be dead. Bright, sweet, quiet, always had a smile on his face, he didn’t deserve the pain and suffering he went through. Today’s funeral was the most difficult, yet beautiful I have ever attended. To see the pain everybody was in, his poor family, his closest friends. I live in a small town, everyone knows everyone. So even though I wasn’t close with Dylan*, his close friends are my close friends. His six closest friends, two of them pretty good friends of mine were pallbearers. What an honor. It was so hard to watch them have to carry out their bestfriend in a casket. Carry him past the honor guard, his whole class and his teachers. The church was packed. His grandmother done the eulogy, imagine that; having to bury your grandson.
During the past few days, as soon as I heard of his passing, I began to think; “life is too damn short”. And it is, you never know when it could end, that’s why I think it’s important to live every day like its your last. Don’t wish your time away, you’re only young for a short time! So do what you want. I can’t finish writing this post as its incredibly difficult for me, my thoughts are jumbled and I can’t get anything out straight in any good order. I’m so confused, so many mixed feelings, unsure of what lies ahead. But when I sleep tonight I’ll dream, and I’ll hope that I’ll wake up tomorrow, and live another precious day because I don’t know how many I have left, nobody does.